When a compliment isn't a compliment

Watching a TV show on obesity and stomach stapling:

Me: You know, fat people always have really good complexion.

Lyn: Yeah that's true. I wonder why.

Me: Must be because they don't lack any nutrients at all, cos they eat so much.

*Pause*

Kavita: Hey Fi, you have really good complexion.

Girl Talk

A girly conversation at our flat resulted in the following conclusions:

Black guys like looking at booties

White guys like looking at boobies

Asian guys like looking at slim girls

Indian guys look at girls overall in an unfocused way, cos their girls are supposed to cover up

(PS: I take no responsibility for the accuracy of these statements! But you’re welcome to dispute them lol)

Sole Asian

When my German flatmate moves in today, there is no doubt that I am, and will be, the only Asian in my flat for a couple of months at least. Currently, I have a Kiwi, a Belgian, and 2 American flatmates, and it’s been great fun.

After living overseas for years, there comes a point when you just cease to notice the colour of your skin, until the occasional Asian jokes surfaces. White people cease to be white people, and they don’t all look alike. You stop hugging random white guys cos you mistook them for your bf (I'm kidding).

Perhaps I just became one of them? I actually feel more comfortable talking to Malaysians here in English rather than Mandarin, even when their English isn’t that great. Some Kiwis are surprised when I tell them that I’ve only been in New Zealand for 3 years. I feel a mixed sense of chagrin and honour when I hear that. On one hand, I have successfully blended in. On the other hand, that could mean that I have abandoned my own culture. Maybe I am a SPG deep inside, treating Caucasians like gods, and wanting to be one of them.

But then again, I’m not really one of them. I can’t stand their notion of equating a good night out with getting pissed drunk, screaming like mad women and puking on the streets. Nor can I understand their national obsession with rugby (I’m generalising, of course). The ones that I do click with are the ones who are outside the norm.

The people I hang out with in law school are mostly Asians, although they come from Indonesia, China, Philippines, Hong Kong etc. When I see an Asian, I’m far more inclined to start up a conversation with him/her, compared to a Caucasian.

When it comes to matters of the heart , I spill my beans to a select few who are unsurprisingly, Malaysian mostly. The way I think and react is so ingrained in me by the culture I was brought up in that I know only Malaysians can truly understand what I am going through. The exceptions would be those whom I’ve known so long that they’ve come to understand my culture.

As a sidenote, it’s funny how when one is overseas, one is less a Chinese, Malay, or Indian. We’re just Malaysian. Maybe the whole population of Malaysia should migrate overseas. Maybe then we can be ‘Malaysia truly Malaysia’ instead of ‘Malaysia truly Malay Chinese Indian’. Or maybe we should just abandon race-based politics.

Flat Woes with No Toes

Dear friends and family in Malaysia,

Hide your chocolates, clear your schedules, and prepare yourselves for the upcoming event of the year: Da Fi's homecoming! *resounding applause and cheers* Will be back in December, wee~!

Meanwhile, I've been busy packing my stuff cos I'm getting kicked out of my flat soon. It's been really interesting this year, flatting with Iraqi, Japanese, Chinese and Kiwi people. Some of my flatmates are hard out party people, and it's been hellish having to put up with their lifestyles.

Nevertheless, I've come to realise that it was a blessing in (VERY heavy) disguise. For example, the alcoholic Iraqi guy gave me some of his law notes which turned out to be pretty useful during my exams. So if you're living with the worst flatmates ever, try and look to the bright side... at the very least, you know that for next year, it can only be better!

Just to let you have a taste of how horribly disgusting our flat was, here's a letter our dear residential manager left on our noticeboard (i don't like her much, bleh):


25th September 2007

The residents
Flat 38
Everton Hall

Today I came with Kevin to check that the stuff in the lounge area had been removed.

I am disgusted by the state of your flat. It is filthy. Earlier in the year we had complaints of rats in and around your flat. I am not surprised! Looking at the amount of food and other rubbish in your kitchen, any self-respecting rat is going to have a fantastic time there without any effort. We shall not do anything more to get rid of vermin should they decide to move in.

Be aware that commercial cleaning charges are likely to be around $300- $400, possibly more, to make your flat habitable at the end of your Resident Contract period.

I suggest you sit down at a flat meeting and decide NOW how you are going to address this issue.

Sincerely,

Jane Rendall
Master

Sorry, no photos in the near future cos I can't find my camera cable... Oh well, don't think you'd want to see a real photo of the rat anyway...